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| march 12 1996 - april 2 1996 |
March 12 1996
Oscar caught me a mouse today. He left it at my feet in the morning. I was proud of him because he is a good hunter but also I was sad for the mouse because he just wanted a warm and safe place to live. I buried him in the yard. I feel like the mouse alot. Not that I need a place to live but that I feel like I am being hunted by the big man and his scary friends. They look like my friends and family. He gets closer every day and I dont know why. Mommy still will not talk to me when I bring it up. I keep having dreams like last night about being at grandpas house looking for his special book. I know all his hiding places now because they keep showing me. When I am there I dont feel the big man looking at me. I have this dream the most.
April 2 1996
Didnt see Kevin today. Maybe hes sick too? I dont like eating lunch alone. I got brave after school and I asked Mommy if I can go to the book club with her. She just said no Im not old enough for it yet. I asked what they do and she said they read books and talk about them. I think its like reading time in
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| april 2 1996 - april 12 1996 |
school but for gownups. The grownup books are big and boring and hard to read but Im glad it makes Mommy happy though. Maybe if I read more Mommy will love me more. I wish I could jump into the story books and excape real life. Mommy has a new man coming over now and his name is Scott. He is more nice than Rick but he feels like a business man and not a daddy. Business men remind me of the big man.
April 7 1996
Im naked in a big thick pool and it smells really bad and I cant see and I can barely breath. I swim and swim and swim and then I find a wall. It is slimy and gross and made of skin. I am in a big stomack. I touch my tummy and theres a big cord going in my belly button. I cant see but I feel there are others inside with me. They are screaming. Then I wake up.
April 12 1996
Today was the closest I saw the big man. I went to the bathroom to pee and he was there across the room. He had 12 arms
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| april 12 - may 13 1996 |
and looked like a octopus. I said hello and asked his name but he didnt talk back. I got angry and threw a toilet paper roll at him and then I woke up on the floor at the end of school with a big head ake. Im going to the docter now because my ears were bleeding. Turns out I was ok and Mommy said she has a suprise for me if I do good in school. I think its the new Nintendo 64 game system that comes out soon because Ive been talking about it alot at dinner. There is a new Mario game for it too and it looks so cool because its 3D and not flat 2D like my real Daddys old games. Its like the Spyro game Kevin has and I really wanna play it. I hope Mommy gets it for me.
