| november 17 1995 - november 20 1995 |
November 17 1995
Docters said I am ok I think. I stayed the night at the hospital. Mommy had to leave because of book club. A man came to visit me at night. I pretended to be asleep and he said he loved me and kissed my head. I think it was the docter but I dont know if it was a dream. I am heading back home but I have to take more pills now. I hate the pills. They make me dizzy and sick. If I am sick why do I take pills that make me sick? Mommy doesnt like me talking about the big man. She gets sad. I want to go to New York for cristmas because I want to see snow and meet my famly. Rick doesnt want to go but Mommy said we definately will. Im not as sad today.
November 20 1995
Kids at school made fun of me again because they said I ran away but I didnt. Kevin is still a good friend. At least I have Kevin. He just got some glasses because his eyes dont work okay. He asked what happened and I told him the truth. He is the only person who listens to me about the big no face man. I am scared of the
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| november 20 1995 - december 6 1995 |
big man because he does not do anything most times. Kevin thinks it is a ghost but I think it is a monster. I dont know if he is a good monster or a bad monster. Why am I seeing a monster?
December 6 1995
I thought I lost my journal but I kept it under my bed and forgot. The pills Mommy makes me take make me forget more and give me weird dreams. Sometimes I only pretend to take them. Mommy said Rick is gone for good and I am happy. He was really mean and hit me because I ate his snacks. But Mommy is sad and lonely like me now so I am sad too. I wish I could talk to docter Corenthal who gave me this journal about the big man. I asked Mommy but she said that she cant find his phone number. I tried to look up Dr Corenthal at the library but I cant find out how to call him and Im afraid to ask Mommy again because she says the big man isnt real and I dont want her to be sad and angry at me.
